The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
03/02/08
Nice extended metaphor!

In a poem like this with a lot of repetition, you want to come up with some good, complex rhymes, to counteract the predictability of the stanzas. Give your readers something delightful at the end of each stanza.

There's some very pleasant imagery in this.
03/02/08
I like your thoughts in this poem. My favorite stanza is, “Lord let me be a lighthouse - Let the brightness dispel the din - Lord let me be a lighthouse - With its streaming conquer sin. May we all take your message to heart. You’ve chosen the perfect verse for your poem.
03/03/08
Love the message and the beauty of the alliteration in this poem. Each stanza shed light on our responsibility as believers.
03/03/08
I liked this a lot. Sometimes repetitions is good to drive the point home. To me simple is better than complex, (stays with you longer) good job!