The Official Writing Challenge
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Oh, did this bring back memories of Heartbreak Ridge! Good job capturing the emothions of the hike.
Oh my, can I relate to this one! My husband and I have had similar experiences with almost anything outdoors, or to do with finances, or trip planning...well. Anyway, you did a good job of placing me in the middle of the hike. It can be very humbling to learn from our spouses, but beneficial, too!
Heehee. I'm glad they're okay. That's a really close call. The title was catchy-it made me want to keep reading. This was pretty good, my favorite line was where Sandra said "And I used to like my husband" all because he'd morphed into Mr. Know It All. Great stuff! ^_^
Love this! I wanted to tell her to quit complaining and just listen to one who knows better. The campsite being on a precipice surprised me, and the Bible verse he happened to be reading was perfect. That's just like God, isn't it.
I love this one! Not boring at all. I don't usually comment because I am so new at this, but I had to on yours. I tend to skim but I read every word of this story. It drew me in and kept my attention. I figured something might happen at the campsite but didn't expect the precipice. I would love to read this in an extended version.
Excellent use of present tense, if gives this a sense of immediacy and intimacy. Really good story, Dee, with a twist I really didn't see coming.
I like the casual voice, and the interaction between the husband and wife. The ending was great too.
You captured married life so well!!
Red ink: I don't know if she would admit being wrong quite so quickly. If it were me, I'd just mumble something and admit being wrong later.
"Hes getting very close to becoming a casualty on this trail..."
My fav line. Great story, pace and reader interest. Not boring at all, I found it very entertaining. God bless.
This is great! The writing is top notch. You kept my interest and the ending was wonderful. Two thumbs up.
How true we wives can be, I remember a similar golf outing. You put me right there. Great job with the topic.
Excellent job with dialogue. The emotions are so real, you place your reader on the trail with your MC.
This is an excellent commentary on marriage and leadership/submission issues. I think we've all been there, if not on an actual precipice, maybe a spiritual or emotional one. Nice job!
This is really good ... not boring at all. I was engaged from the beginning, and totally didn't see the end comming. Great illustration of the topic.
This was great! How often have I said "Hes getting very close to becoming a casualty..." in so many things with my husband! You did great with the reality of married life.
I think I only did tents once, and I never told anyone about making the Koolaid out of lake water. I feel your pain! Good work.
This was so nice to read. I enjoyed every line. Right on topic and a great message. Wonderful job!
Extremely enjoyable and very much like real life. Great job!
great story Dee! It captured the feelings of the characters very well.

"Hes getting very close to becoming a casualty on this trail" laughed out loud at this one.

Finding themselves on the edge of a precipice in the morning brought back very vivid memories for me!
I think you got into Sandra's mind beautifully and her inner dialogue and turmoil was great. I knew something was coming when she finally "got her way" but I wasn't expecting the precipice, but it all tied together just as should have to deliver your message. Great writing - as always.
An OK title, but a good piece. Got to be one of the best it's been read 4 times mor than some. I'm hoping some day to stumble over the secret of how to get my pieces read more. Good job! Keep writing!
What a riot! Been there, done that. Seems like you have a winner.
Enjoyed the realistic banter between the couple, and the ending was a surprise. I thought a bear or something, but a cliff!
Such a delightful clever piece by a wonderfully creative writer. I loved this.
Your story is so skillfully written and perfect for the topic. I love that you intertwined the verse with it. Very, very nice work!
Congratulations on your EC!!!! Who's in the lead now, huh? Give your hubby a nudge... ;)
***Congratulations, Dee!***
Yay Dee! Congrats on your level placing and EC with this!!!
Way to go Dee. Big congratulations on your EC. Great piece. Are you movin' on up yet? :)
Way to go, Dee! Isn't it time you moved up with the rest of us? Your writing certainly deserves it.
Congratulations DEE.. absolutely love your writing.. if you are moving up now, I am excited for you and for the rest of us in advanced, for selfish reasons.. you are truly a Master whether its now or later..> Dianne
Terrific win, Dee. Many congrats! You deserve to move on up and you'll give them a run for their money! **smile**
Oh, Dee, this is a great story! I felt like I was right there the whole time! Congratulations on your win. It's sooo well deserved!!
Dee, what a wonderful job you do at expressing the wife's feelings. This is some great writing. Congradulations!
This is so good. I was laughing when I realized it was her husband she complained about. I sympathized with her sore feet. Didn't expect them to be right on the edge of a cliff. So many little details to keep the reader going... Congrats on EC.
Just read this thanks to Jan's class!
Great job. I wonder if the symbolism was intended for their marriage falling off the cliff if she didn't get a new attitude!!!
Glad for the opportunity to give a belated congrats!