The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Lovely story. I really enjoyed Uncle Leo's return to the family fold. One of your biggest strengths is your use of description. I hope we hear more about Uncle Leo in future challenge pieces. :-)
I loved the feeling of this story. Uncle Leo was welcomed so warmly. Very nice. To be honest, the missionary theme seemed tacked on at the end, but your story was top notch. Good stuff.
What I like- Wonderful story! I loved your choice of verbs - very strong and descriptive. This flowed with very real scenes. great job!
What I might change - the ending was abit abrupt as I was so caught up in the story:) I wanted to know more about his reaction to the changes in the family.
Delightful tale, and well told. Uncle Leo is a finely drawn character about whom I'm dying to know more! .
Your style of writing is very like the content of your story: warm and inviting. You paint a vision of a lovely environment through the eyes of your Uncle Leo narrator. And, your hints of something different teases the reader along to the conclusion. I like your cozy story!