The Official Writing Challenge
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What I liked - Everything! This was so delightful! I liked the use of present tense- I was feeling thier love and excitement build with them and then - boom- you dropped that scene in - very true (sadly) and powerful.
What I would change - as I said before - nothing at all - it is so well written.
Very unique take on fire-fighter...but definitely true. On the other side of the coin, (just to be fair & square) - stubble, a/k/a the "5 o'clock shadow" can also be a fire-fighter. :) Bottom line, great entry, well written, and an enjoyable read.
Very enjoyable read. I hope Andrew learns its what's inside the wrapper that makes the candy bar rock. But maybe that truth can be saved for the next short story.
LOL! You made me feel like a newlywed again. I enjoyed this piece's subtle sense of humor. Thanks for the chuckle! :-)