The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1412 times
Member Comments
This was a good story - if rather saddening. Your passion, skill, and knowledge come through clearly.

Thanks for sharing, and God bless,

Both sad and well-told. You caught me at the beginning and pulled me through to the end. I "felt" the emotion all the way.
Oh my. So sad, and so tenderly written. Excellent work.
I wanted so desperately for the little colt to make it! If only this were fiction! But due to the conclusion, I assume it isn't. Nice job and an endearing, but sad story. Good job on topic, and nicely written.
So gripping and sad. The action seemed to flow just right - wonderful job!
Sad indeed, but well written in a manner that draws the reader to feel the emotion you meant to express. Good job! Blessings.
This is a sad, but beautiful story. As an avid reader, if this was book length, I don't think I could put it down.
I've done my share of whitewater rafting. I only say that because, reading this story was like commiting oneself to the rapids. Once you get in, your in. Your story pulled me along skillfully, and the ride/read was enjoyable. Great job, as always, Ann. God bless.
I loved the contrast of the sadness of the foal's death with the relationship between the two women. Such a sad story, yet your ending clearly says "life goes on." Very well written.
Masterful writing & dialogue! Yes, I agree---If this were a chapter book I wouldn't want to put it down.
And not one sparrow falls without Him knowing. This is how your story made me feel. Thank you, it is beautiful. Brenda
I felt like I was right there with you. I wanted so much for the colt to survive. You captured each emotion inviting the reader to live the experience right along with you.
So sad.......

Your first line was everything a first line should be.

The way you used words to describe freeing the foal's body like giving birth was very clever ... but of course, the result wasn't life. That was extremely effective.

Great writing - well done.
Ann, I was a judge this week and really enjoyed your story. Heart-wrenching and wonderful. Congrats!