Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: EMBARRASS(ED) (11/03/16)
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TITLE: Chicken | Previous Challenge Entry
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11/10/16 -
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“…and today, Lord, please help us to be good witnesses for you in how we live and what we say, for your precious name’s sake. Amen.”
Josh closed their daily prayer time together and then finished off his cup of tea. Amy began clearing the breakfast table.
As Josh went out into the garden, the September sunshine climbed up over the hill and floodlit their new home in West Wales. He loved the quietness and being away from crowds of people. After inspecting their prolific veggie garden, he looked at the hedge bordering the lane below the garden; it badly needed trimming now its summer growth had ended.
Not one for using machinery, Josh began his work quietly with his special pair of hedge clippers.
There was not much traffic on the lane; it only led to several more narrow lanes that curved beside the streambeds and the Welsh hills.
He stepped back into the gateway as he heard a car approaching. It slowed down and stopped.
“Can you tell me how to get to Maesyrhiw?” the man called out.
Josh and Amy were just getting the hang of some of the difficult-to-learn place-names, and Josh was delighted to give the driver clear directions. For once, he knew exactly where the place was.
“Thank you,” the man said, “you are my salvation!”
Josh said nothing. The man drove away.
As he walked slowly back to the bungalow, he was disgusted with himself. Why had he chickened out of such a God-given opportunity to say something for Jesus?
“What’s up, love?” Amy asked as he came in. She was well aware of her husband’s shyness and of how easily he got embarrassed.
“How could I do that?” Josh said, almost in tears. “Didn’t we read earlier on about not being ashamed of Jesus?”
2 Timothy 1:8.
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Based on a true incident many years ago.
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I think this was well written but it did seem like a word was missing here or there and if the sentences were broken up a little differently I wouldn't have had to read them twice to get their gist. Kind of like with that run on sentence I just wrote.
I hope Josh learned from this like I did. I felt so bad but I never let it happen again.
I also think the format could be better.
Separate paragraphs where appropriate and place dialogue on a separate line for more white space.
These small things help the flow of the story for your reader. Keep writing.