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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: TALKATIVE (09/08/16)
I kneel only because it feels right. The large wooden cross both soothes and mocks simultaneously. The pain deep inside forces its way to the surface.

"Why does it hurt so much?"

Life is crushing me and I cannot bear the load. I lay down. I know I am alone, but I still feel strangely exposed. This isn't me. I am proper. I am upright. I have good posture. Yet, now, even kneeling is too much to bear.

"I need your help so much."

My lack is so obvious. The veneer that others see is a lie, but it is my lie and that alone keeps me going. I ward off the world because I am so afraid of what will happen if I allow it in. My innards are boiling.

"Heal me."

I am so tired all the time and yet I accomplish so much. Each day is one activity after another. I meet the expectations of everyone but myself. I run, run, run until I collapse into unconsciousness. I rise again and do it one more time. I promise that the next day will be different, but even as I say the words I know they ring so very false.

"Why is there nobody to come to my side?"

I feel so very alone. In the midst of the crowd I feel no real connection. I love my wife and she loves me, but somewhere along the way a wall has come up that neither of us can figure out how to scale. I love my children, but each day I find they are leaving me behind as they grow and change.

"I am empty."

Each day I give more and take in less and less. Life has become an endless string of moments lacking meaning. All around me want so much more than I have available. The pain of coming up short is the real misery.

"Pastor Fuentes."

I open my eyes and turn my head in the direction of the voice.

"It's time."

"Thank you, Antonio."

I stand to my feet and walk quietly onto the stage. The podium seems a million miles away. As I walk I look out at the crowd. They are waiting. They are eager. Their eyes speak loudly to my greatest fear.

"Will I have anything to say?"
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This article has been read 405 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Joy Bach 
09/15/16
Good one.
Larry Whittington
09/19/16
I hope this is fiction.

A pastor who truly feels this way may soon, if not already, loose the feel of the call of God in his work. Counseling is needed to save him and God's work. The elders or an off site counselor is needed.

I did like the arrangement or spacing of this work. I don't know the name of this kind of arrangement but I have used the term, "Prose Poem". Keep writing. Writing is the expressions of the inner self and these need to come out at times.
C D Swanson 
09/19/16
Very well done, I felt MC's feelings throughout.

God bless~
Sherry Brock
09/19/16
The ending surprised me on this one and I felt the emotion of the MC. If this is not fiction then please take the advice of other's comments and may God Bless.
Pamela Hill
09/19/16
This expresses sadness on so many levels! I've written some things that were responded to by people suggesting I get help. They were fiction.

This causes the same response to rise up in me... Please get help!

Now I know how those others felt when they read my piece.