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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: MEMORY LANE (04/23/20)
They were each busy, doing their own thing. One was cleaning a table while another was placing chairs around it, ever so perfectly. Some stared at a TV never noticing that I’d come into the room. One lady stood near a mannequin adjusting its wig and another rocking her baby while a well-dressed gentleman stood holding a suitcase, waiting at the door. Looking over to my right, there he sat, staring out the window…frail, looking all alone in the world. It broke my heart to see him that way.

“Hello daddy,” I said as I gave him a hug. “Hello doll,” he responded with a big grin. It lifted my spirit to know, that even though he couldn’t remember my name, he knew my face. His eyes, which were growing more and more dim, lit up each time he saw me.

“What are you looking at?” I asked. “I’m watching mama pick beans. I don’t like picking beans so I’m hiding,” he giggled. I laughed with him. Years earlier I’d learned that it’s better to live in his world then try to force him back into the present. It only brought more confusion. Many times, it created arguing or crying which caused more anguish for us both.

“Here, let me scoot you to the table. I brought you some banana pudding,” I explained as I was sliding him over. This was daddy’s favorite. You’d think he could eat his weight in banana pudding. I’d bring him an overloaded quart container and he’d scarf it down, then have cookies and sometimes candy too. His eating had slacked off considerably, but for now he still liked sweets. Eating habits plummet and eventually can stop all together when the last stage of Alzheimer’s is nearing. Daddy had become a shell of what he once was. Since he had no health issues, he could eat anything we could get down him. I happily brought whatever he’d eat and as much as he wanted if it kept weight on his now skeleton frame.

An aide brought a bib and placed it on him. “There you go daddy; your clothes won’t get messed up if you drop any pudding,” I explained. With a big mouth full he said, “Good…mama gets mad if I get my clothes dirty before we go to church.”

It was hard holding back tears, watching as he forever lived in memory lane. Sometimes he was a child and other times he was fighting in one of the three wars he survived. The bible tells us to honor our father and mother. Exodus 20:12. My brothers and I did our best to bring him love, and comfort in his declining years.

It was a battle of mix feelings when we finally admitted to ourselves that there were too many safety issues to continue keeping daddy at home. He was like Houdini. We tried everything we could come up with to keep him safe, but he was forever coming up with new ways of getting into danger. Fixing dinner as he was resting in his recliner, I’d hear a noise and he’d be trying to light the heater with a striker! He must have had dozens of those things hidden. We couldn’t find them, but he could. We hid knives and sharp items because you’d find him trying to shave with one or pick the door lock or use it as a saw. We had lots of guilt when he left home, but we knew in our heart it was best.

Even though it was heartbreaking, and I’ll admit challenging at times, I’m grateful God let me walk down memory lane with daddy. As he circled backwards around the mountain of his life, I’m glad I was by his side. He talked about things I never knew.

Alzheimer’s is a sad reality. Many families are dealing with it now, while others may be in the future. It’s a rough, long road, but if you let it, it can be a time of making memories…even good ones. Cry when you must but learn to laugh with them when you can. Talk in the world they are living, and you’ll find it an easier ride for everyone…you might even learn something you didn’t know.

It was an honor caring for my daddy in his time of need. I’ll always cherish reliving moments with him as he traveled back in time.

I miss you daddy. I’m glad we got to walk memory lane together.
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This article has been read 122 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Joy Bach 
04/30/20
This is great writing. You showed us what it was like. Seems like it’s true. My heart goes out to you. Keep it up.
Barbara Lynn Culler 
05/02/20
Awww, I had tears for this story. How sad for you. Well done and I hope this places.
Chris Goglin 
05/04/20
Great job! I like the way you intermingled narration and dialog. What a loving daughter you were to be there for your Dad and understand what he was going through. You have also helped us realize what it might be like some day in our future. God bless!
Susara A Botes
05/04/20
Well written, thank you.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
05/05/20
This is a heartbreaking piece in one way, but in another it's a beautiful love story. You do a fine job of taking the reader back to this place and the emotions are palpable.

A few minor things to remember: When a different person speaks, always start a new paragraph. When using Daddy as a name, start with a capital letter, but if a common noun, then a lowercase. For example: My daddy was a strong man. I love you, Daddy.

Alzheimer's is a horrible way to lose a parent, but one thing I rejoiced in this retelling was how Daddy was excited about going to church. Jesus must have been strongly etched in his heart to have such positive memories of church. If I had to relive one part of my life, I hope God is as essential to me as he seemed to be to your MC. That's a great message. Good job.