The Official Writing Challenge
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I enjoyed this very much. However, the ending is much too abrupt. An ending that ties all the thoughts together would stick with the reader better. Good job!
A good poem but I agree with Arlene...perhaps another stanza or two to wrap things up. Keep on writing!
So many questions that we often all ask. I also felt that the ending left me hanging, and I wondered what you meant when you don't question the care you receive. Add a response to your questioning and this will be a beautiful piece.
Nice poem. Just the tweaking of the stanza's placements is needed to really flow. Gather the 'in the world' ones (scene, parliament for example) and gather the more spiritual ones. Just a thought