The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/06/19
You did a fantastic job of drawing the reader into your opening scene. Good ending also. I suggest reworking the middle to make it more conversational and less sermon-like. This piece could be useful enough to be worth the extra time spent rewriting.
06/08/19
I loved this!
I'd not considered that there could be a less pure reaction to the question, so that's why the daughter was shocked. This kept me involved to see if it was accidentally a FB page. I would have preferred to have the Bible verses separated from the text, just to clean up the look of the page. It also needs the version used as part of the citation. But this was a great story!
I enjoyed this. Blessings