The Official Writing Challenge
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You made this Bible story very readable. It's well written. Nicely done.
Interesting take on a well-known story. I noted a quick reference to a map, but shouldn't the story be centered around the topic, rather than casually mentioned? Also, I was confused when the one character said not in his state of mind. I did not understand what state of mind he was referring to. It would have been cool to be there when Jesus showed up!
When I was growing up, our pastor preached every Easter Sunday night service on "The Road To Emmaus." It was one of the highlights of the year. That day when Jesus stopped Paul was pivotal to Christianity. I love how you handled this wonderful story! Kudos!
I like how you told this story. Sometimes when we've read the same passage so many times, we miss some of the details or meaning. When you tell a Bible story in this format, it helps a person think about it from a different perspective. Well done.
They didn't need a map to get them back to Jerusalem! I appreciated the idea of Jesus' explanation of the writings of the Prophets being like a map
It always takes my breath when I read about the moment the two from Emmaus recognized Jesus. Your telling of the story was no exception.
You did a nice job of retelling this familiar story. You have a nice beginning and the ending is full of hope. I'd urge you to save the Bible verses' footnotes until the very end to not slow the flow (unless they are exact quotes, you don't need to cite each one individually.) Yours were paraphrased, so you could put them all at the end. Although the topic was a bit weak, (you need more than just a mention of the topic word, the entire story needs to ooze the topic), it has potential. I could see ways it could've been worked in more. You have a passion to spread the good news. Keep writing.
Excellent job with this!
Well done,
God BLess~