The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Ha Ha, you're honesty made me laugh - especially the line about enough rocket fuel to blast off.
Your thoughts seemed to ramble around a bit and got a little confusing at times. Also, a specific example would help the reader to relate to your thoughts.
Thanks for writing this. Keep it up.
Ugh... I wish I could edit my comments. ("your honesty")
I’m supposed to be learning how to critique. Please excuse this amateur attempt: You’ve got good material here to work with, but it needs shaping. If this were my piece, I would scratch the first paragraph and start over. Work the definitions of walking and talking into your story — your second paragraph. Your ending thoughts are useful and on topic. Knowing you have something very worthwhile to say here, I suggest you start over and write this again. It is worth investing the time and effort. I’d love to see the next draft.
Great job with this, loved your message and this entry.

Thank you.

God Bless~
I like your spunk! But consider your audience when choosing words, for they may be offensive to some, and right on the mark to others.No more victim for you!