Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: SLIP OF THE TONGUE (01/26/17)
- TITLE: Is my bean dizzy?
By Mike Hill
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Folks, this competition is fierce! We hope you are enjoying the sights and sounds. Up for grabs is the whole bagel – the crown jewel of the Quad T skating season. Whoever wins this competition will be crowned Queen of the Ice. These diminutive athletes, these pixies of the rink would have hearts as big as the crown they’re after and as hard and ruthless as Al Capone’s - if he had one.
With only the favorites left, from this point on, expect no holds barred, win at all cost, nothing is too ruthless skating performances. These girls are poker-faced! It will be fabulous – leaving you breathless as you watch their skills, the lutzes, the salchows, the axels, the exquisite spins, and whatever else they’ve concocted. They’ve honed to perfection their jumps and routines. But don’t overlook the subtle distractions that originate from the benches and are missed by many. As with the jumps, their cunning and conniving has been honed razor sharp and is a source of pride among the girls. The plans are top secret – even the coaches don’t know until they happen.
As this competition draws to a close, the crowd favorite and leader in the standings is next to take the ice. Miss Bellus Lingua is removing her blade guards, checking her laces and taking the last deep breaths. On the ice, she is poised, confident and elegant, yet possessing the cunning of a lion, the speed of a cheetah, the stealth of a leopard and as bloodthirsty as a hyena. She is at the apex of her career, the role model for all young skaters, the epitome of all things winning. She knows no bounds. She has skills that people haven’t even thought possible yet!
The time at the beach she took before this competition refocused her ambition of winning this title. She’s looking good; her color is good and pink. From this distance, her skin appears velvety and moist - resilient. Her legs are steady and limber, and her arms are long and elegant. Moving as a butterfly, she is capable of wowing the judges with her presence.
But what’s this? Clouds of Purple People Paper are falling from the rafters. Her music starts – “She’s a Bad Mama Jama.” Composed, she begins her routine as if nothing is happening. Her first series of jumps go off without a hitch. The next landing has become a little hairy as she has to land it amid a group of woodchucks while avoiding various wood piles on the exit. Folks hold on to your seat; this competition is getting interesting.
What’s this? One of the spotlights has veered from following her routine and is now focusing on the far end of the rink. Another skater is entering. There is no mistaking who this is. With his flamboyant pickled pepper costume, it can only be the beguiling Peter Piper – the skating scoundrel! In an unprecedented display of conniving, he is attempting to rendezvous with Miss Lingua. It doesn’t appear that he will be able to get close to her, though. A line of fuzzy wuzzy bears have emerged from nowhere and are crossing Peter’s path knocking pecks of pickled peppers from his pockets. The bears seem to be saying something to Miss Lingua. I can barely make it out. No, they are singing to her! Unbelievably, their song “I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream” does not deter Miss Lingua. Intensely focused, she is skating a flawless routine amid the chaos.
Brrrpppp The music stops! Silence! The horror of horrors – what will she do? She keeps going – dedicated and intense; she skates to the tune burned into her consciousness by years of repetition. Brrrppp! Wait, the music is starting again, but it is not the same song! It’s Cab Calloway and the Hi-De-Ho Man song.
The pro that she is, Miss Lingua starts getting into the new beat and skates her heart out – jumps punctuating fabulous staccato step routines timed perfectly with the hi-de-hoes. Anticipation prevails as the hi-de-hoes come faster! What will happen? She slips!
The next morning the headline of the morning paper reads, “ Miss Bellus Lingua falls – Tightly twisted tune trips talented tongue!”
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