The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
12/04/15
Awww...This touched my heart. That last part made me blink back tears.

Well done.

God bless~
12/05/15
Very touching story.
12/06/15
Nice storytelling. Meaningful and thoughtful. Well done.
12/06/15
Great story and wonderfully written. Red ink: use proper spacing between paragraphs and dialogue. No other suggestions.
Great job!
This is lovely. You grabbed my attention right away. I could feel the tension and anxiety practically jump of the page.

Be careful about overusing exclamation points, especially the dreaded interabang.

I think you did a great job of developing the characters. As I read about the man, I was entranced, but also I thought I hope he isn't a mysterious stranger. It can be a bit overdone, along with the clich, it was all a dream. Although you did add a sense of that, it was a little different than the typical stranger so that's always good. Of course, the stranger being overdone is just my opinion. Others might feel totally different.

I think you did a nice job of writing on topic, and the message is clear and powerful. Especially at this time of year, it seems too easy to get caught up in what we don't have. Like the Bible says, give thanks in all things. I'm definitely giving thanks for this charming story.
12/10/15
I am so glad that I took the time to read your story;I almost didn't because of the spacing. In fact, I had returned to the list of entries but your title drew me back.

Your story spoke to me and I am sure to others as well. My concern is for someone who may have missed out on your beautiful message because of the spacing.

Other than that, I was drawn in and could easily visualize the characters and the setting.

12/10/15
Congrats!

God bless~
12/16/15
Rebecca - Congratulations. This story touched my heart. I didn't read the story earlier - because of the spacing. Shame on me for almost missing out!

God bless.