The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/07/15
Wow - great story!

WEll done,

God bless~
I enjoyed this heart-warming enticing story. You did a fine job of painting a picture for me.

The only place I really stumbled was when you ended the one paragraph at your friends' door and started the next with being missionaries in another country. You needed to transition that a bit so it doesn't feel so jolting.

I enjoyed the selection of your words. Living in upstate NY myself, I could almost hear the crunching of the snow. God performs these types of mini miracles every day, but often fail to take note. I wonder as I write it if is because they may seem small to most people, but if it's important to us then it's important to God. You did a great job of writing on topic all while delivering a message we all need to remember from time to time.