The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
03/08/14
I truly enjoyed your story and the realistic interaction between the two young MC's. The dialogue was flowing in a natural verse, and I liked the thought provoking issues they tackled. Excellent wrap up!

God bless~
03/10/14
Some very good points you made in your story. It's not always easy to ascertain the truth. Even Jesus' disciples did not quite believe the truth until after His resurrection.
03/13/14
I like how you used a sceptical MC to draw us into your story. Simone's feelings will ring true for many and will help non-Christians engage with your story too.

Just a little note about quotations: use single quotation marks for a quotation inside of another quotation. For example your first sentence would be punctuated like this, 'When you see these things happening, lift up your heads for the end is drawing closer!' Jesus once cried to his followers

So many people have been hurt by Christians and they often carry their bitterness for years like your MC. It is a warning for us to be wise and gentle in our dealings with non-believers. Thank you for sharing your story.