The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 450 times
Member Comments
There has to be a good reason for leaving the lawn unmowed! Sounds like home ...
This was a fun read and I enjoyed it immensely. Nice job. Great lines throughout!

God Bless~
This was so fun to read! I loved the dialog! It made me Laugh Out Loud..LOL:)
Oh this hysterical. I so enjoyed it. I could picture every detail in my mind. This is how many family vacations start.

Little bit of red ink - I noticed you had some errors with punctuation, especially with quotes. For example when Elenea is speaking you end it with a question mark, then say Grumbled Elenea. Technically Grumbled should have been a lowercase because you were including a tagline and it was still part of the same sentence.. Now if you were to switch the sentence around to after the quote say Elena grumbled... then you woud have started a new sentence and not part of the same one. It can be quite confusing. There were other times too when you should have used a comma instead of a period in the quote and vice versa. Also at the very end you went from third person to first.

Overall though I thought it was a delightful story that so many of us can relate to. I laughed at the moral of the story too. You did a wonderful job of holding my attention throughout the whole story.
This is so real! I enjoyed it very much. Some refining with punctuation is needed, but your story is great. Thanks for writing it.
I loved the story and the title was spot on. Sounds like some of my vacations. I laughed out loud at some of the happenings in your story. Great job and thanks for sharing.
Congratulations & God Bless~