The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
That was really cute. I love your "voice" through the flashback. Especially the stuff in parenthesis. Excellent story.
I liked the flashback too-creative!
Very nicely done.
Very enjoyable read.
Very well done! I love the way you flashed back to tell the story - and it was a GREAT story. Hurray for you!
Good work! Nice story of memories.
Love all the family nuances - you've captured them well. A good read!
Flashbacks are not easy to pull off, but this was handled beautifully. Really like the way you draw out the different family members characters. A loving tribute, well done. God bless.
Beautiful story. Reminds me of some of my own family fun.
Nice story. I like how the characters interact.
I was worried she'd have the heart attack as she opened the door. I'm glad she got to enjoy her party!
Well done and an enjoyable read. Just glad gamma got to enjoy the moment!
Lovely! I love the way you connected the beginning and the photo and pulled it all together at the end.
Lauren, it was a good story, and a sweet story. Just one thing I did notice as I was reading though - right at the start - it's this: "One day, I was sorting through some old family photos. I had promised my aunt that I would have them for her by this weekend." You start with "One day," as though referring to something in the past, but then you mention that you would have the photos for your aunt by "this weekend," in the present. If you'd said "by the weekend," that would have been fine. Minor thing. Overall it was a simple, nice story. I chuckled at the kick for the giggling cousin. Love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)