The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/24/09
You had a good beginning, but the piece ended abruptly. Wondering if it was a techincal glitch or done deliberately. I could feel the MC's emotions here.
07/25/09
What was written was a good description of how a teen feels--wish there were more to this story!
07/26/09
I wasnt sure if this teen was a boy or a girl some clues would help. The only one was the voice changing. It was good as far as it went but as one can write up to 750 words there was plenty of scope to develop it.
I'm lost! I want more! Good style here but I want more! (do I sound like a teen?)
07/29/09
It's as if the rest of the story is lost somewhere,
excellent beginning but it's like the power going off when you've just got interested in a good movie!
I feel robbed, as your emotions are so strong in the beginning. I also wanted to know more:)