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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Home for Christmas (11/20/08)
Thomas couldn’t wait to get home from work. He loved his job, but the highlight of his day was spending the evening with his wife of two years, Lydia. Thomas walked in the door to find a candle lit dinner on the table.

“Hi, Honey. How was work?” Lydia asked as she came out of the kitchen with a plate of garlic bread.

Thomas kissed her on the cheek. “It was good. I finally got my reports turned in for the year-end project. This new Junior Executive position has been a challenge.” Thomas placed his briefcase and jacket on the couch. “What’s the special occasion? Did you get your promotion?”

“No, something even better, come sit down.”

Thomas prayed for their meal. “Okay, I can’t stand it any longer. What’s going on?”

“Do you remember me telling you I had a doctor’s appointment this morning?”

“Yes, what did he say?”

“Well, we’re going to have some great news for your parents at Christmas dinner.”

“You’re pregnant?!”

Lydia smiled at Thomas as he got up to hug her. He was thrilled. Everything was perfect. His life was just as he had imagined. He had a wonderful wife, stable job, and now, they were starting a family.

On Christmas day, Thomas and Lydia went to his parent’s home. They couldn’t wait to see Mom and Dad’s reaction, when they heard about the baby. Everyone sat at the table and held hands as Dad prayed. They were enjoying their meal when Lydia reached over and patted Thomas on the arm. He looked up at her, and she nodded her head.

“Mom and Dad, we have some fantastic news!” Thomas said enthusiastically.

Dad started to cough, “Is that smoke I smell?”

***
Thomas awoke with a smile that quickly faded. As tears fell down his face, he shivered. “At least I can still see them in my dreams.” He lifted the flap on the cardboard box he had slept in last night. “I can’t believe it’s been a year since I lost my family in that awful fire.”

Thomas climbed out of the box and looked down the alley, where he saw the other homeless men building a fire. He pulled his tattered coat tighter around his worn clothes and walked towards them. “Six months ago, I was released from the hospital and now I am here. Just a brief moment and my perfect life was gone.”

___________________
“Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.” James 4:14 (KJV)
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Marlene Austin
11/28/08
Compelling story, but I would have liked some details explaining MC's survival if everyone else died in the fire - without the details it seemed a little strange. :)
Joy Faire Stewart
11/28/08
I enjoyed the dialogue between husband and wife tell of their joyous news for Christmas. Though the ending is sad, I like the unexpected in a story.
Gregory Kane
11/30/08
A charming first scene, full of easy-going intimacy and satisfying dialogue. But I felt that your transition was too sudden, that it left far too many unanswered questions. An additional couple of paragraphs would have made all the difference.
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