Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Uncles/Aunts (04/17/08)
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TITLE: Aunt Irene Strikes Again | Previous Challenge Entry
By Tim Pickl
04/21/08 -
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Whenever Uncle Bob had enough NERVE to visit HER church, she incessantly whispered about him behind his back.
Everyone knew the routine. Irene always started her fiery tirades with, Did you hear what Uncle Bob did… and she spewed her vicious gossip.
+++
Uncle Bob spotted the ladies on a glorious spring day in the church parking lot. “Good day, ladies.” He tipped his hat as he walked past them.
Scotty Johnson ran and hugged him, warmly. “Uncle Bob! Uncle Bob!”
Irritated, Irene inquired, “Victoria, did you hear what Uncle Bob is doing today?”
Victoria was soft-hearted, not as annoyed and high-minded as the rest of the church ladies. “He’s going to give First Communion to little Scotty Johnson.”
“Yes--but at their home! Can-you-believe-it?!? The Johnson’s ought not to come here any more.”
Victoria was surprised at Irene’s growing disdain, and tried to calm her down. “Well, he is following the Lord’s Supper—“
“Not if I have anything to say about it! The Council is going to hear about this, for sure!”
“I think you’re too late.”
Uncle Bob zoomed past them and sped away, headed for the Johnsons’ home.
+++
Uncle Bob was a retired Minister, radical and feisty. He loved Jesus. He studied the Word of God and often prayed from his heart, every day. As he drew closer to Jesus, he loved to share God’s Love with action.
That day, Uncle Bob and Mr. Johnson studied the Bible, and discussed the good things of God. Finally, the Johnson family gathered around the table. Mr. & Mrs. Johnson, their ten-year-old son Scotty and Uncle Bob made a circle by holding hands.
“Uncle Bob, would you please pray for this meal?” Mr. Johnson gently requested.
Uncle Bob bowed his head, dramatically paused for several seconds, and then prayed a simple prayer. After he finished, everyone enthusiastically said, “Amen!”
Mr. Johnson announced, “Uncle Bob, thank you for visiting our home.” He looked at Scotty. “I know this is different, but I wanted to make your First Communion special, so we asked Uncle Bob to come here today.”
“Thanks, Uncle Bob.” Scotty excitedly said.
“Thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson--and Scotty, for this opportunity to break bread with you. Please follow my lead.”
On the night when he was betrayed, the Lord Jesus took some bread and gave thanks to God for it. Uncle Bob took some bread, looked upward and thanked God.
Then he broke it in pieces and said, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this to remember me.” Uncle Bob broke the bread in pieces.
In the same way, he took the cup of wine after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant between God and his people—an agreement confirmed with my blood. Do this to remember me as often as you drink it.” 1 Corinthians 11:23b-25 (NLT) Uncle Bob held up the cup of wine and sipped it.
Then, he looked into each one's face and stopped, gazing into Scotty's eyes. He solemnly said, “The Lord’s Supper does not save us. It is a memorial. We do it to remember the price Jesus paid for our sin. His body was broken, and His blood was--”
Instantly, there was loud pounding at the front door. It sounded like two people knocking.
“Who in the world could that be?” Mrs. Johnson asked incredulously as she made her way toward the door, and swung it open.
“Ohhhh, it’s you.”
Looking like a bully who just got her way, Aunt Irene stood there with her arms crossed. Church Councilman Craig stood by her side, staring shyly at the ground. “Mrs. Johnson, we’re here to deliver a Cease and Desist Order to Uncle Bob.”
As Craig slowly reached into his briefcase, Irene impatiently slapped his wrist and grabbed the paper out his hand. She shoved the letter into Mrs. Johnson’s hand. “Here, give this to Uncle Bob NOW!” She clutched Craig’s arm and spun around and they both stumbled down the front steps and landed hard.
Uncle Bob appeared and helped Craig up, but Irene couldn’t move.
She had a stroke.
“Call 9-1-1!” Uncle Bob ordered.
Then, he earnestly prayed for her.
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“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”
Proverbs 16:18 (KJV)
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Great job with the action and the dialogue.
The ending kind of surprised me. I guess I wasn’t expecting the stroke. I think with a bigger word count, you could have made this great story even better. I wanted to see what happened after Bob prayed for Irene.
Thank you so much for sharing. I enjoyed this.
But the storyline confused me some. I didn't understand why a retired minister would be divorced. (I know that happens, but it didn't seem to make sense with the rest of his character.) So while I liked this little snippet, I didn't follow the story very well.
Very well written--I just want to know more. :)
Very good writing, Tim.