The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/08/08
Interesting and very visual, this unfolds like several feet of movie film--very nice.

FYI--"Bible" is always capitalized. I felt that the "oomph" ending was "...something different about her" and the rest may have been unnecessary.

I hope they do get second chances!
02/09/08
Oh, I Liked this! It's a twist on the topic in that he was judged by the company he kept, but it turned out it was a false judgement. Unfortunate. I hope they get a chance to meet so she can see the truth.
02/09/08
I really enjoyed this. The descriptions were good. I would love to hear the rest of their story!