The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 658 times
Member Comments
Wow - you packed a lot of "story" into this entry! I feel like I lived a whole lifetime in these few words! You kept me engaged.

The last paragraph seemed to completely change the tone of the piece - maybe there was a better way of working that information in - or even just leaving it out. I don't think it was central to the story.

What a wonderful legacy you have. Keep writing!
What a lovely story, and very evocative of the time in which it is set.

I hope you will consider writing this some time in short story fashion, with dialogue, so that we can really get to know the characters better.
A sad yet moving entry. I think it would have been even stronger if you had put the last two paragraphs into the story. Perhaps as issues that the characters faced (for example, in responsed to opposition from those opposed to infant baptism) and how they worked through those issues by considering those particular Bible passages.
I suspect that you are correct when you say that entire households were probably baptised as mentioned in the book Acts. I see it as a form of baby dedication, dedicating that child back to God while they are in your care. This read more like a journal to me with the inflections of the way the MC would speak. A little wordy in spots but overall a good job.
Congratulations, Patricia. Your entry placed tenth in Level 2. The Top 15 in each Level and the Top 40 Overall Lists are posted each week in the Weekly Results and Highest Rankings Forum of the Faithwriters Message Boards.