The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/19/07
This story delighted me! A great play on the expression "carry a tune in a bucket."

"Heals" in paragraph 3 should be "heels."

Great descriptions! My favorite phrase: "slight swishing sound." I could hear this and enjoyed the alliteration.

The title also grabbed me--as I'm curious about any title that contains a personal name. Good job!
I liked the story. If you gave away less of the surprise in the begingin that may have made it even funier. Keep up the good work.
Cute story. A different approach to humor. Good job.
04/23/07
Great story. I could see it all happening. Love Noella - a charmer for sure.
04/23/07
Absolutely delightful! I love your voice, and your description is very good. Great title, too.
04/24/07
I really enjoyed your take on a familiar saying!

Consider eliminating one or two of the "you see"s in the first 2 paragraphs.

This had the feel of a fable, very entertaining.
04/24/07
My thoughts too, it has very much the voice of a fable. Liked the way you took a cliche and made it ring true.
You did a great job of telling the story in a humorous way. I don't think you'll stay in intermediate for long. Great work!
04/25/07
LOVE it! What a play on words - gotta love a visual pun!
Cute! I like how you devloped the character of Noella, I would've loved to get a litte more 'inside her head' But very well done! ^_^