The Official Writing Challenge
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What great memories!
Creating paragraphs separate by spaces will greatly improve your entry.
07/23/18
What a great memory. I liked your imagery at lunch time. I could see the tables laden with food. The last two sentences were great. As far as red ink, I would suggest you use your spell/grammar check. There were quite a few grammatical and spelling errors and the check would help you catch some of them. It might help if you print out your story and read it many times before submitting. You would probably catch some of the errors that way as well. Keep writing and sharing those memories.
You've a great start here. It was nice to travel down memory lane with you. Breaking it up into smaller paragraphs would help the reader with extra white space. I'd urge you to ask someone to read it aloud to you. I think you might be surprised how it sounds. Hopefully that will help alert you to some of the minor mistakes throughout. Also if the person stumbles, that line may need some smoothing out. If she reads it in a monotone, stilted voice, you'd want to change the pacing, switch up sentence structures and maybe even add dialog. For example just a tiny change might help: Growing up, I'd enjoyed the times when my father bundled us kids up and packed us into the car. I trembled with excitement and anticipation so much it was hard not to wriggle on the long drive to visit my grandparents.

I know I took some liberties here, but my changing some sentence structures once in a while and adding active verbs to paint a picture helps draw the reader in more. I left out the destinations because, although important to you, the reader really doesn't need to know to enjoy the story. It leaves you with more words too so you can describe scenes even more. If it's a true story, it protects the identify of some of the people in the story as well as allowing the reader to imagine her trip to Grandma's.

I like your message. There's more things to feast on than food such as grandparents' love, memories, and God's word. You did a nice job of tying in the topic while delivering a message. Keep writing and read as many other stories as you can and leave some feedback. You're off to a great start and I look forward to reading more of your adventures.