The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/08/18
Great piece of info and use of the topic. Well done!

Blessings~
02/08/18
Well done.
I totally enjoyed your take on the topic. It's different and it took me to a different time.

My biggest suggestion would be to add more details. Instead of listing facts about Finland, weave them into the story or perhaps retell in your words the story of your great uncle.

You have a great foundation here. I think you were on topic in a fresh and interesting way. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Good use of the topic. Thank you for sharing.
God bless.
02/10/18
A lot of information given here...several stories or even a novel could be derived from this or even a non-fiction book.
02/10/18
A well wriiten story that left me with a lot of information I didn't know. This story has so much potential to be expanded into more of the feeljngs about the lives at the end of the bullets,the devestation war brings internally. Great job.
02/12/18
I agree with the above comments, but realise you were restricted by word count. There are opportunities for great personal stories here.
I loved some of your descriptions: Awaking thrashing through nightmares; at the end of each bullet, grenades were husbands, fathers, brothers, sons; and the bells as rigid metronomes tolling through the generations.
There is definitely a beautiful poet in you.
02/15/18
Congratulations on your 1st place finish in the Beginners category, Ruth.

I liked your original take on the topic and learned many details about Finland that I didn't already know.

You have the makings of a wonderful story about your Finnish relative, but you need more of an emotional connection with your readers.

I look forward to reading more of your entries.
03/17/18
Well written historical, yet personal article!