The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Beautiful writing and creative taken on topic!

I liked the descriptive writing. I think there were some punctuation or grammar issues, but I'm not an expert on that. I could picture some of the descriptions pretty easily. Thank you.
Your title intrigued me, yet when I used to learn the meaning of empath, nothing came up. I'd really like to know what it means, so please leave me a private message. ​

Your first paragraph confused me. It didn't help me connect with the story, which is interesting.

At the end you wrote" "the snooze button no longer worked..." It's good imagery yet it wasn't clear on what was snoozing.

Keep writing.
This might just be the beginning of a longer piece. It needs to go somewhere. Where is the next page going to take us?

Work this one up to see where it might go. It is headed somewhere.