The Official Writing Challenge
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An interesting read. I was surprised at how you brought Jesus into the story. I would also suggest always reading through your writings a couple of times before submitting. I have found by doing this myself I find any misspelled words or left out words. I discovered some in this writing. Keep up the good work!
05/05/17
You are doing great work for the Kingdom, keep it up. Try to work some dialogue into your writing in order to liven it up even more.
05/05/17
I too thought this was an interesting story. It would have been nice to see you spice it up, like Graham suggested, with a little dialogue. Put some mystery, or suspense in it.

You did a good job. Keep writing. God bless
05/05/17
Well done!
I really enjoyed this entire piece.

Blessings~