The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a fascinating tale of corruption, politics, and so-called Christians who use their professed faith to con others.

My biggest advice would be to add details to help pull the reader in more. The first few paragraphs are all back story that weigh the reader down a bit. One way you can paint a picture for the reader (even in true stories) is to use active sentences. I'll give you a quick example of how I might write this story. (Of course this is just an example and the details might not be correct, but hopefully it will show you what I mean.)

As the CEO of a pharmaceutical company, I sat in my office on a Friday afternoon, eager for the busy workweek to be over. Rona, the company's accountant burst in with three checks in her hand. "I need you to cosign these right away."

I took the proffered documents and frowned. "Rona, you know the company's policy of not signing checks at the last minute. It's in place to prevent fraud."

Rona raised her eyebrow and stuck out her lower lip. "You know I'm a God-fearing Christian. Are you implying I would steal? This company really needs the money right away."

Then you could mention something about the corruption. It's a great story, and I bet when you tell it, it's something that people really listen and respond to. It's not always easy to get that same reaction to the written word, but you've got a great start on it. Keep writing and reading other articles too. You did a nice job of writing on topic. The fact that it is a true story makes it even more powerful.

It was readable but I couldn't connect things together.
Wow. An amazing story of fraud an corruption. Thanks for sharing. God bless.