The Official Writing Challenge
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I enjoyed this story. You did a nice job of setting the atmosphere with the great word choices and sentence lengths. I liked the way you used dialog to move the story along.

I was a bit confused at the first line of dialog though. It seemed a bit snappish for no apparent reason. After my second read, I realized she was likely reacting to the sign on the pump. I think if you had her read the sign aloud or something like: The sign on the pump directed her to pay before pumping. Stomping inside, her anger and frustration increased with each step.
With a similar transition, I think I would have understood it on the first read and it would also paint a picture in my mind.

You did a great job of building a big story in only 750 words. This is also a great reminder. We don't know what's going on in a person's head that may make her irritable. I also liked your message about God's time table. I'm sure I'm not the only one who can relate to that. Nice job.
07/17/15
Fabulous entry. Powerful message, and so well written in detail.

God bless~
07/20/15
Clean writing with a clever finish! I really enjoyed this piece:) You won't be in beginners for long;) Well done!
07/21/15
A very well written and interesting story with a worthy message too. This should do well. Great job.
My favourite line was Whose clock? At that moment we know where the story's going and we're reminded to do things God's way.
AMEN!
Wow! A dynamic story, and relatable to many folk - including me. I found my treasure at thirty, and still holding tight to God and each other after forty-two years . . .