The Official Writing Challenge
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The opening paragraph drew me into the story. I wanted to know what dilemma Gordan was faced with at his Bible study. Well-written piece.
05/19/15
Very creative, with some great descriptions. Thanks so much for sharing!
05/19/15
I like this.

My only suggestion would be to keep Gordon as the focus even in the middle paragraphs where it is more devotional in nature. Have Gordon share the truth as questions he has himself. So for example, instead of this: "The conclusion must be that our spirit has become as pure, as righteous and as holy as it will ever be in eternity, it contains no sin, no inadequacy, no fear, no depression and no discouragement." Try something like this: "Gordon pondered the conclusion. Perhaps it was his spirit that had to become clear. Did this mean he had to rid himself of sin, inadequacy, and fear? What about depression and discouragement?" Or something like that. I felt Gordon got a bit "lost" in the middle. ;)

I love the comparison to the pipe at the end. Great and creative example.