The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/23/15
Well done! Beautifully said.

God bless~
This is quite lovely. You did a nice job of highlighting all of the many blessings of life. I'm not a poet expert, but I'll point out one thing I noticed. In the beginning, the voice was the impossible, I'd you because you were talking to the read. Give thanks is implied You give thanks. Next you switched to the plural first person (we), and in the end to singular (me). You may want to keep the voice consistent throughout. In the forums, Jan recently did three lessons on voice in her thread, Jan's Writing Basics. Overall, I think you did a nice job. You definitely were on topic and delivered a lovely message. It's something we can all relate to and learn from. Nice job.