Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: SLOTH (indolence; laziness) (01/29/15)
- TITLE: Can't Get Up | Previous Challenge Entry
By Rebecca Lunn
02/04/15 -
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“—(grunt)—where is my other slipper? I need to get up to look for my phone to call Mother.”
“—(loud yawn)—I guess I can put it off for a bit…I’ll do it in a few minutes when the show’s over.”
“…well, lookie here—french fries under my cushion—but, no phone…no slipper…where? Where? Where is my phone? I hate getting up—grrr—“
“I’d better not waste these fries even though they’ve got dust on it—I’ll just dust them off. They’ll taste a tad better with a dollop of ketchup.”
“Wha-at?! Everything’s against me! Se-e! There’s no-o milk in the fridge except two dribbles of—(sniff)—soured milk—peeewww! A-n-d, there’s no-o bread for toast except these three pieces that’s got mold in it. U-gh! Oh well, there’s four squirts of ketchup left for my cold fries.”
“Oh no—(gasp)—who didn’t click the cap tight after using the ketchup? I’ve flicked some onto my wedding dress! Should’ve hung the dress back into the closet this morning out of the way…(sigh)…”
Ring…ring…ring…ring…
“Oh the phone—the phone! I can hear it under the lazy-boy! Now who would be so muddled as to put it under there? Must’ve been the cat…oh sooory, kitty, I’m late feeding you again, poor little dear!”
“Oh hello Mother! Wa-a-ah! I’ve got ketchup all over my wedding dress! Can you come over right now and help me clean it off? The wedding is tomorrow! What? Why can’t I do it? Because you are The Mother! You’re the one who fixes everything! I’ve got to get my beauty sleep now—it’s past midnight, you know!”
Ring…ring…ring…ring…
Zzz… “…h’lo… ‘Wake up’…? ... what time is it?... ‘noon’…?...is that all…?..”.ZZZZ
Ring…ring…ring…ring
Zzz… “…h’lo… ‘Wake up’…?...but it’s only a quarter past…”
“Sleep is so good…(mumble)…I just love sleep…turn over…ahhhh.. turn over again…aahhh…warm apple-turnovers are as yummy as this warm blanket and pillow…I don’t want to get up …I can feel myself drooling…dreaming about piggies-…-in-cheesy-blankets…wiggling their delicious little curly…tails…zzz”
Ring…ring…ring…ring…
Zzz…”WHAT?! I’m trying to sleep!...What wedding?! I can’t go today! Can’t you hear that rain pounding down? Can’t you see those black clouds looking like a pack of lions going for the kill—or is it a ‘pride’ of lions—oh, who cares! I can just see me slip in that wet and get myself smashed and there really will be no wedding!---huh?! Oops, pardon me, Father, I thought you were someone else. You know I’m hard of hearing when I’m drowsy. You’re at the door? Well, why can’t you open it? I can’t come to the door right now cuz I’m not dressed and it’s too cold and I’m still yawning….oh okay! Just for you I’m coming…”
Ring…
“OH Billy! Oh where have you been, Billy Boy? I’ve been waiting and waiting for you to call, my Charming Billy!---Excuse Me?! Postpone the wedding?! Not on yer life, young man! I’ve been waiting…let’s see… ‘3x6 and 4x7’… years for my Big Day! I HAD been a young thing and HAD kept wishing, oh never mind…boohoooo…well then—let’s make a deal, sugar pie—what about let’s do our wedding in six month’s time so I can lose my last twenty pounds I’ve been working on for the last year so I can fit back into the wedding dress? And you know, that’ll also give my mother time to get the ketchup off.”
Knock-knock-knock-knock-knock
“—grrr—coming—I’m coming—I still can’t find that other slipper… (THUMP)…oooWWWWooo!...who’s put water over my kitchen! Help! I’m flat on the floor and done jarred my back! Now I really can’t get up…oh ma-a-a-n-n…the ceiling is leaking water from that storm! Should’ve fixed the roof ten years ago when I had that paying job. At least Father’s here at the door just in time…there is a God after all. Maybe he can help me up.”
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And she must have been "a young thing and cannot not leave her mother."
There's a reason God say's that a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife. Marriage just doesn't work right otherwise.
This brought to mind someone being "Late for their own wedding". You hit on the procrastinating face of laziness well. Lot's to think about with this entry. good work.