The Official Writing Challenge
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Insightful and on topic. It would help the readers if you break up article into paragraphs. I loved the phrase, "act the part without being the part!"

Wing His Words
I think you did a great job of building the character. You took me on a delightful journey through the musing of the MC. He left off the page and came to life in my mind's eye.

The main red ink I'd offer is to go back and count the times you used wolf or sheep. It was over ten times. Many think it's important to use the topic words in their articles, however, some of the best on topic stories never mention any of the words. This quarter has been particularly challenging since many are taking the sayings literally. You managed to avoid that pitfall.

You have a natural knack of breathing life into your MC. I'd challenge you to try to write on topic next week without using topic words. Read some stories in Masters to see how some can accomplish just that. I have discovered the more I comment, the easier it is to see what I like or what doesn't work for me and apply it to my own works. It's helped a lot. There is an excellent thread on the message boards called Jan's Writing Basics. She gives great tips for all levels of writers. If you do her "homework assignment" She will make a point to answer all posts. I've learned quite a bit from this thread.

Keep writing what God lays on your heart. Together you and Jesus together will touch many hearts.
Great story and great job with this entry. I loved your descriptions and the internal dialogue of the MC as he took in his external surroundings.

I especially liked the internal conflict as he pondered whether to join the "young man"

Excellent work here!

God bless~