The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is a nice piece that makes the reader stop and think. You did a nice job of writing on topic while still delivering a potent message. Be aware of the voice you use. You start out in second person, which sometimes can feel less personal than Yvette first person. Then later you switch from you to we. Also the phrase unique to you and I should be to you and me. A good way to double check is take out the word you. You wouldn't say unique to I so that way you know it should be to you and me. I like how you showed the Bible is God's example to us. He loves us enough to show us His way. This is a well written thought-provoking piece. Nice job.
I enjoyed this entire piece. I thought it was on topic and had a good message to bring forth.

GOd bless~
This is a very nice article. It commands us to think about things. You have a great way of describing and are good at weaving words. I look forward to reading more of your work. Keep writing!
Thanks for sharing with us your informative piece. Well done and well on topic.
The longer sentences made it difficult for me to keep my thoughts together.
Congratulations for placing 7 in your level! (Highest rankings can found on the message boards)
You have given us a good spread of material here, and a mix of long and short sentences keep our interest coming with you. Well done.
Thanks for sharing. You are a gifted writer.