The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/01/13
This was an excellent story, I felt the frustration and anguish of the MC...and the descriptions were flowing so readily, I felt as if I was a passenger with the MC and the old lady! This was fabulous, felt like a story in a magazine, or at the very least in Master level.

Great job.

God bless~
This is a great story. You did a nice job of showcasing the MC's pain. Though I liked the ending, I kind of wished the lady didn't mysteriously disappeared. For me personally, it would have packed more of a punch had she been a normal mom who grieved her son in jail, but simultaneously rejoiced that he found Jesus. In literature, the mysterious stranger/angel is overdone. I do think you handled the topic in a brilliant way, both with the whining of the MC and the whine of the jet engine. Your message of handing our pain to Jesus is one we all need reminding of from time to time. Well done.