The Official Writing Challenge
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06/16/11
Such an act of kindness never goes unnoticed. A couple of Sunday's ago a missionary reminded me that it's not our money anyway.
06/16/11
Nice story of a woman whose act of kindness reflected her relationship with Jesus. Her love for Him and others allowed her to bear good fruit--helping the woman and sharing her faith.
06/16/11
The last line says it sll: The Lord will pay me back.
06/19/11
A lovely and sweet story.

The word 'blond' refers to males; when writing about females, use 'blonde'. And I thought the back-and-forth between the two women went on a bit long; if you were looking to have the story fill the alloted word count, consider adding a bit more character development.

This is a great story for the topic, and a wonderful start!
06/20/11
You told this so well that I wanted to talk to Jane. She was an obedient servant and evangelist, but I wish she had given Caitlyn her phone number so she could have followed up.
06/22/11
This is a great story of how opportunities to showcase Jesus occur in the course of our day.

The story line was somewhat simplistic and predictable. An opening sentence should immediately catch the reader's interest. I would work on this. For example: "It had been a bad day.." is a better "hook," in my opinion.:-)

Keep writing and reading, you're on the right track!
I can tell you are really working at showing not telling and getting rid of the tags. Keep up the hard work, it is paying off!