The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
09/19/05
Thank you so much for this story with a note of hope, but without a pretty, cliched ending. Very well-written. Nice job!
09/20/05
Very well written, I like you handled the dialog, without getting all drippy. Tough subject well presented. Move up a level.
09/22/05
Great writing. Excellent dialogue.
09/22/05
Nice.
09/22/05
I was a little worried when I read your hint, but you handled this very well! Excellent story!!!
You handled this extremely well and got the balance right. The characters and dialogue are strongly handled and the awfulness of the situation handled with great care. I agree, too good for this level. Congratulations, a personel favourite. God bless.
09/22/05
Great job! Very descriptive scene, and believable characters.
09/22/05
Far too often this is the reality of life for some people. Good take on the topic. I loved it.
I liked your title, and the message, I agree this touchy subject was well handled. GOOD JOB!
09/23/05
A very well written entry - some hard truths there, that some people are so close, but chose not to believe.
09/24/05
Believable characters, solid sense of place and convincing g dialogue make this a well told story. Great effort. Wondered, as I read, why Nickie didn't join Bobbie at the bar for an OJ, not such a smart thing for a recovering alcoholic to do, huh. Yeggy
09/24/05
Fine tuning: One other thing... watch shifting point of view, Bobby is the POV character but you give away inner information about Nickie: 'Nickie replied, smiling slightly despite her present surroundings.'
Yeggy
09/25/05
Effective contrast of priorities - well done.
09/27/05
Debbie, this was a very good entry and I sincerely believe that you won't be on Level 1 very long. You actually rated very well with the Level 1 judges, and ranked 14th out of the 44 Level 1 entries. So well done - that's very good.

You are a legitimate beginner, so don't feel that you have to move up until you either place or feel that you have the experience to take that step. Level 1 is a great place to hone your skill and have a chance to shine in the Level awards. It will be time soon enough to move up the ranks. With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)
10/15/05
Wow! Good job on your work! Ditto to all the above - poignant message well done.