The Official Writing Challenge
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I had to read this one several times to make up my mind, but I've decided that I really like the unique meter and rhyme scheme. It's different, and it works for me. And it doesn't state the obvious to the reader, but I believe we're reading about a soul on the brink of salvation--yes?
This is a song, find someone to score it.
Like Dub says, this is a song. Really loved the use of metaphor in this to describe the souls journey from the shady shack to the light; subtle, intelligent and written with feeling. Really good stuff, well done. God bless.
Mmmmmm.... I don't know about this maybe I need to read it a few more times or hear it put to music