The Official Writing Challenge
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A lovely article, however, I don't believe they had postcards then.
Well written and thought out, thanks for sharing!
09/06/05
Full of imagery!
09/06/05
Well written and delightful.
09/07/05
Be careful about using apostrophes in plural words (others, believers). A good story of suspense and intrigue!
09/20/05
Nina, this was a very good story, but the main problem for the judges was that Paul's writings couldn't really be classed as "postcards" in a literal sense. So when it came to fitting the topic, that let your entry down. It was just a bit too much of a stretch to think of his letters to the chuch as being of the "postcard" variety. The other thing that caused a bit of a hiccup for me was that the tense seemed to change in the middle, when Phebe was recalling the services in Priscilla and Aquilla's home. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I think you referred to services generally, so this sentence, "Someone softly started a psalm" caused the reader to jolt a bit. It could have been something like, "Someone would softly start a psalm.." But then you made the switch to a specific service when you said, "Aquilla and wife Priscilla ministered mightily to the believer's that awesome evening." That change from general to specific, was a little confusing for the reader. But overall, it was a good story and you definitely have a lovely way with words. With love, Deb