The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Great story!

It feels like you ran out of room, and the ending felt a bit rushed. Next time that happens, try to cut words elsewhere in the story, and flush out the ending a bit.

I really want to know what happens next. Good suspense.
This is a good story, I love how the seasoned homeless, Kaleb cared enough to convince the 2 newbies to call someone by telling them that the homeless scene was not a good thing.
I really liked how you wove in the grass stains so subtly. Kaleb was too wise for his age, but helpful to the younger boys. The story held my interest. I too want to know what happens next.
A brief look at a serious problem, very good writing!