The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 674 times
Member Comments
Loved this. It was an exciting read. So glad that Oliver truly found the Lord. So many people make empty promises and do not carry through. How wonderful for that baby to have a Christian father and mother. There is no greater gift that anyone could receive. Good story.
Great story. It took falling off a cliff to get Oliver's attention, but he finally listened to the Spirit's calling. The ending is doubly happy. :)
This is a wonderful story. It bounced around quite a bit without giving an indication of the time frame, so I would suggest keeping it in one snippet of time with either flashbacks or clear storyline breaks. Also watch out for passive voice - more active verbs will liven up the story. Nicely done!
Good job with the suspense and tension, and also with the flashback.

It's a good idea to establish the time period earlier--I was a little bit startled when she gave birth in her house, as there was nothing earlier to indicate a "back in the day" time period.

Very nice story of redemption.

Boy, this was a cliff hanger! Nice story and great ending. You have a good handle on grammar and spelling.

Polish up the dialogue and time frames. Good job! Look forward to more from you!