The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Tragic, and happening all around us. I could feel the emotion behind the message.

Pam Ford Davis
This story kept the reader interested from the first word until the last. Double spacing between paragraphs will make it much easier to read. Also, look back - I saw a couple places where you have missed a word in a sentence, or used another word instead of the one I think you meant. Spell check is great, but it won't show you that. Good job. Blessings, Laura
I forgot to point out something this morning. I noted that only once in your story do you speak with a southern accent. You refer to "yall." I think if you are going to have the reader make notice of the accent of you or your sister characters, then I think you should make it consistent and indicate it throughout the story. I think that's all now. I'll leave you alone now and will go to my room. I think your story line was excellent. And remember, these are only ideas and/or suggestions. Blessings, Laura