The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is a sad story that is all to common. The story flowed nicely and came full circle. Good job.
I love the structure of this, and your transparency.

Be careful of easily-confused words: I caught 'isle' for 'aisle' and 'it's' for 'its'.

This is a very strong entry for this level.
I, too, like the structure of this story. I like the vunerability of the mc as well. Congruations on your well-deserved recognition.