The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
01/31/09
Deep and profound. Really tells a story about values we hold.
I'm sure John is walking on streets of gold. Good lesson. I feel the pain of the MC.
01/31/09
I truly enjoyed your entry. I could feel the oppressive atmosphere and need for revival. Your main character's heart was so burdened and it came through clearly in your story. One correction I could point out: track should be spelled "tract." I still can't get over the idea that those graves are covered with asphalt. How sad. Your story will stay with me a long time due to that alone & that's the mark of great storytelling.
02/02/09
Your MC and POV were well-spoken. I could feel the heaviness of heart through it all. Good writing.
Another beautiful job Stina. I loved your line, "The air was heavy, saturated with thousands of prayers that never made it past the vaulted ceilings." Good for you!
02/05/09
Congratulations on your "Highly Commended." I loved your story!
I would question whether these prayers made it past the vaulted ceiling. How are we to know? Doesn't it depend on the pray-er?