The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/06/08
Such a moving story. I like the way protrayed how the salves talked during that era it make the story more realistic.
06/06/08
06/07/08
This makes us thankful for our freedom. Good job on dialect and dialogue. This could be expanded into a whole story.
Well done.
06/09/08
Very, VERY powerful. Your dialect is exceptionally good, as are your descriptions.
Your message is heart felt and well done.
06/09/08
Excellent work setting the time period for this story and I like your creativity in writing this for the family home topic. Your dialog seemed very good. That was such a sad time in our nation's history. Nice work.
06/10/08
Just wonderful - great dialog AND dialect. My only red ink is in this line: "Ruthie began dinner preparations." That is very "telly" and you could make it more "showy" as you've done in the rest of your story. I've always loved fiction about this time in our history, and you've done an awesome job.
Pamela, proof positive why you should be moving up a level...this was simply great. Wonderful use of dialogue and techhique. Well-done - Loren
06/11/08
great job. One of my favorites so far. Makes you grateful for what you have.
06/13/08
Pamela, my friend, this story was absolutely wonderful, and it richly deserved its "Highly Commended"!!!!!

What a creative take on the topic! I loved how you deftly described Caleb and Ruthie and their home. Your imagery was excellent, and I loved sentences like "She felt as if her arms were dead weight against her body, so heavy was her sorrow," and the description of the table with its cracked vase of wild flowers on the blue scrap of material. I could see the entire scene in my mind's eye! This is definitely one of my favorites of all the pieces you've written!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! :)
I think God is confirming your talent, Pamela. Congratulations as you rightfully move on up! Loren