The Official Writing Challenge
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Short and Sweet! I like this little slice of life bit, the short title and the bit of truth at the end, fits it just right. Thanks a bunch for sharing! ^_^
I would love to know more about the mother. I bet it would be very interesting. Wonderful advise in the last paragraph.
05/03/08
I do like the short and sweet aspect but confess that since you did such a great job catching my attention with the opening, I wanted to know what was significant about that moment. I was a little disappointed to then get a brief history (which was interesting and touching)--I merely had been captured by the snippet of a moment that I wanted to blossom further.
05/04/08
Your title and compelling first paragraph definitely caught my attention.

I agree with the comment above that I would have liked to have seen the lead in developed and transitioned into the message. Also, who was Liz? I assume it was the M.C.'s mother.

Great message at the end. Thanks for sharing.