The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Your story was full of action and suspense. Keep writing.
You definitely drew me in and held my attention with all the action and emotions that bubbled through your story. The end was a bit abrupt but I have the same trouble, the word limit being what it is. Good writing.
Good job with the suspenseful mood.

A more careful edit is needed; you have "feint" for "faint", a few comma splices, that sort of thing.

This could definitely be expanded.
Very exciting! You kept my attention wondering if he'd get away. The ending was a little vague. Who was his rescuer? Also, you misspelled "fainted". This could be developed into a good longer story.
I enjoyed this very much. I do have to say I got confused at the end a little on who was talking, but this was a good. Do keep writing.