The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/14/07
You've very creatively woven your lesson into this story. You have a lot of detail to make the story come alive.

There are a couple words that I think I would change. PM me if you're interested.

I think you show a lot of promise as a writer. Your imagination speaks for itself! Nicely done.
11/14/07
Good message here. I like all the visual images in this story.