The Official Writing Challenge
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Some interesting ideas in the unusual story. If I have a suggestion, it is that you read your dialogue aloud as you write it, to make sure it sounds plausible. Once or twice I thought they sounde a bit 'bookish.'
Thank you for sharing.
You've created quite an interwoven story. It sounds like it could be real. You've used a lot of good words and description here. Thanks for writing this.